You are worth it

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What Do You Do When the Life You Built Was Built on the Wrong Foundation?

What do you do when you realize that a decision you made many years ago—one you thought was the best decision of your life—was made for the wrong reasons? What happens when you look back and see that every choice you made afterward was built on a false foundation?

Do you throw it all away? Beat yourself up over it? What do you do?

The truth is, people find themselves in these situations every day. It could be a relationship. It could be a career. It could be a financial commitment.

Because here’s the thing about life: we change. We grow. We evolve. And that’s not a bad thing—it’s a good thing. Growth is necessary. Change is necessary. Evolution is part of being alive.

But sometimes, the people who were once close to us—whether personally or professionally—don’t see that growth as a positive. They may resent it. And when you finally stop and reflect, you may realize something painful: as you grew and changed and evolved, they stayed the same… or worse, they began to resent you for it.

They may have blamed you, held you responsible for every hardship, put you down, tried to hold you back, or even broken your spirit. Suddenly, you’re in a toxic environment—whether it’s a relationship, a job, or another life circumstance—and you’re in deep. Years have passed. This has become your way of life.

So again—what do you do?

Maybe you’re sick now. Maybe you’re physically, mentally, emotionally exhausted. Maybe the weight of it all is too much. But how can you just walk away from something you’ve spent years building—especially when other people are now involved? Maybe there are kids. Employees. Investors. Responsibilities.

Can you really walk away?

The truth is, there may not be one easy answer. Some people seek counseling. Some turn to prayer. Some seek wisdom from those who’ve walked similar paths. No two situations are the same, and most of the time, they aren’t black-and-white.

The more people I talk to, the more I realize how common this is—and how heartbreaking. And if I had a magic wand, I’d wave it and make it all right for everyone carrying these silent battles.

But since I don’t, I offer this: before you enter into any agreement—whether it’s a marriage, a business partnership, a financial investment, or a long-term job—make sure both parties are clear on what they want, need, and expect.Talk about growth. Talk about change. Ask the hard questions: What happens if one of us changes and the other doesn’t? What if we want different things down the road?

It may seem unnecessary in the beginning, but those conversations can save years of pain down the line.

And if you’re already in that place of struggle, the one thing I can tell you is this:

If it’s affecting your health—mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially, or physically—you have to do something. You may not know exactly what to do yet, but the first step is looking inward. Seek wise counsel. Be honest with yourself. And above all, pursue your true north—the version of life that allows you to become who you’re meant to be.

Because people are depending on you to live that life. And the very first person who needs you to step into that truth—is you.

You deserve to be happy.
You are worth it.